* Very long post alert *
Where is My Heart?
I've thought about this long and hard lately.
And I've had to answer some tough questions for myself.
My life is changing before my eyes. Forced changes so to speak.
I never thought that taking a new job would catapult me into deep thinking and decision making like it has, but alas, it has.
What I want to do and what I know I need to do have finally met at the crossroads.
You see, I took a job that is 2 hours away from my house.
Obviously, making that drive is not feasible on a daily basis.
My mother lives 1 hour from where I work, so to make a shorter commute, I stay at her house
while I'm working. And then I go home to my actual house about one day every two weeks.
I love the job, so I make the sacrifice.
I didn't anticipate working so many long hours every single day, so even finding time to look for a house close to work just hasn't happened yet. My catch 22 is that when I have a day off, I need to go pack my house in KY, but I really need to be looking for a place to live in TN.
The reality is, I've been working 80 hours a week since I started, so when I do have a day off, my body wants to rest - not pack, not look for a house.
(on the plus side, I've lost 24 pounds in the last 10 weeks!)
So, what does that have to do with figuring out where my heart really is?
I'll tell ya.
When do we think the most? When we're alone and everything around us is quite.
I have two hours of that everyday, driving to and from work.
Here's what I've realized..........
1. I miss being in my own home, but I don't really need it.
2. I miss having my things around me, but it doesn't bother me to think about putting them in storage for a while.
3. When I have any free time, I want rest for my body. If I have the option to blog/read blogs,
or just fall into bed, say my prayers, and go to sleep, I choose the latter.
4. If I go into work late in the mornings, I'd rather make time for coffee with my mom than get on the computer and take time away from others.
5. When my husband isn't traveling, and he's not working at the office, he has to come to the town I work in and get a hotel so we can see each other. Usually, I make it to the room around 11pm, and then I'm back out around 6 or 7am. It's not fair to him. It's not fair to us.
God bless him though - he understands that I have to do what I have to do right now.
6. I hate to even admit this, but I find that I miss communicating with all of you, but I'm not missing my own blog. Is that bad? Am I just too busy to care?
Decorating is the farthest thing from my mind right now. And that's what I'm supposed to be blogging about, right? To be very honest with all of you, my heart just isn't there. Maybe it's because I'm so busy, maybe I'm simply too tired. Either way, it's not a priority for me anymore.
Let me make this clear - blogging about decorating isn't where my heart is.
You'll understand in a minute.
For a while now I've had some changes weighing on me. About my life, my blog, my etsy shops, and about doing flea markets.
As for my life, hubby and I have decided that the easiest way to fix our living situation temporarily is to put all our things in storage and move into an extended stay hotel while we look for a place close to my work. This will at least put me within a few miles of my store and immediately eliminate the hour drive each way to work. He will still drive the same distance to work.
As for my blog, here's the realization I've had, which began months ago.
I've thought about what makes me passionate about writing, and what topics I rush to write about vs the ones I let stew for a while.
I think you will all agree that my most heartfelt posts are about the needs of others, and spiritual experiences I've had myself.
When I write about someone in need, request prayer, ask you to lift someone up, or tell you what prayer has done for me, I get really passionate. I believe in the power of prayer and the miracles they can bring forth, and I believe that when good things happen in my own life, it is my duty to spread my faith.
My personal prayer list has over 350 items/people on it.
When I ask you all to help me pray, I can promise you that I am absolutely praying too.
My heart has been leading me to start another blog that focuses solely on rebuilding and strengthening your spirit. I started the other blog weeks ago, but I haven't got it "live" yet.
I am in the process of moving all of my inspirational posts over there.
When I post something there, I'll come here and let you know.
I have so many things I want to cover on that blog.
I'm calling it "Strengthen your Spirit", and it'll be a direct domain.
I will have resources, links to prayer groups, etc.
I get so many requests for prayer in email each week, and this is one way to start a public prayer chain for those in need. I hope you will give it a chance with me.
I'm not abandoning this blog, I'm just changing my focus.
When I have things that are unrelated to faith and prayer, I'll post it on this blog.
And I'll give sewing lessons when time allows.
About my etsy shops, I've decided to close all but one of my shops.
I will only be selling my aprons wholesale from now on to distributors.
(But if you want one, you can always email me.)
I will be closing my practical fun things shop, unless I can find a family memeber to take it over.
The one shop I haven't introduced you to yet will be the one that remains open.
I will tell you more about that when I'm ready to fully load the store.
About flea markets, I will only be doing 2 this season. After I've got all my things packed to move, I'll head to the Nashville Flea Market with all of the stuff I won't be taking with me. Instead of taking time to refinish all the wares in my garage, I'll instead be selling them unfinished for you to do yourself.
I'll let you know when I'll be there and what I'll have.
I've decided I can do with less that what I have now, and I can cope with not spreading myself too thin. And I'm fine with it. The days of trying to be all things to all people are over, and it's time to focus on putting the quality back in my life.
I want to be happy, I want my husband to be happy, and I want our family to remember who we are. We give them so very little time, and they deserve more from us. Times goes by so fast and we really regret missing out on so much.
My hectic work schedule will become leveled out in about another two weeks, and then hubby and I can start looking for a place to live together, and not trying to decifer what houses may or may not have based on the pics we find online and send to each other.
Once that happens, and we get settled into somewhere new, we'll be able to have a more normal life and schedule with no outside commitments.
I crave that day!
So there it is. That's where I am and where Im headed.
And I hope you will stick around to see what happens.
I've made many friends here and I hope to keep you all with me.
I know many of you share my faith and can understand why I feel the need to make these changes, and I thank you in advance.
Now, does anyone out there know of nice house for rent in Murfreesboro or LaVergne, TN?
I'd love the lead if you have one.
I hope you all have a super-duper fantastic day!